Me: Happy birthday? If I'm right, I didn't even need facebook to remind me
Male Friend: You're right!!! Thanks! Where u at now?
Me: I'm in brooklyn eating a bagel. You??
Male Friend: Amazing. I'm starving myself so I look good for birthday pictures tonight. That, and I think I have a hernia.
Me: Omg I love hernias
Male Friend: I think I might just grab some icy hot and lather it up with one of my $100 bills and rub it all over me. That should totally cure my ails.
Me: That is what I do! And what my mother does, and her mother did before her.
Male Friend: Well, clearly your story goes on.
Me: H8 that song. So are you 40 years-old today
Male Friend: Basically
Me: You've got a few more years in you I'm sure
Male Friend: Yeah. 52 today.
Me: Soon you can collect social security and wear hawaiian shirts in earnest
Male Friend: Fo shizzle